by Belinda Kendall
The key in communicating with a man is to leave all the emotions out.
If you had a son that was going through a lot in a relationships, job, or just life: would you start complaining when he comes over?” “Most mothers would not do that because she already knows that he is going through a lot, and he may have come to her house for some type of peace.
When you are in a new relationship and/or marriage, most men have some situations they are dealing with, if they don’t- they were just born. This could also be the reason men cheat, because the person they are cheating with don’t complain. But please know once she starts complaining, he will find someone else.
We seem to have a need to hear the words, “I love you, I am in a committed relationship with you, I want to marry you or let me tell you how much I care.” If that man is coming home every night, supporting you, or being there to help you with your needs, HE LOVES YOU.
We forget that before he met you he had his heart broken earlier, and he promised God and a few more people that he will never feel that emotion again, at any cost. Men don’t handle emotions very well, God didn’t create them that way. Your voice alone wakes up the emotional side of him, thus the reason when a man sees a woman crying he automatic try to figure out how to fix it. The fear that you will do the same thing keeps him from expressing his love. So he expresses his love with actions, and not words.
We all have those friends that every time they call and you see the caller ID, you take a deep breath and then answer or send the call to voice mail. You may say that he will have those conversations with his son/daughter or other family members when they are upset, so he can do the same for me? But the same reaction you see when they call is the same reaction he has when you call.
So stop talking so much, and just watch his actions. I was in an abusive marriage before, and every time he would abuse me, he would always say, “I love you.” Please know I wished so many times that he showed me the actions of love, and not the words.
He can show you better than I can tell you.