You can get a man now, or you can wait.

by Belinda Kendall

Ephesians 5:22 says, “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.” Genes

is 2:18 says, “And the LORD God said, [It is] not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a help meet for him.”
Most parents will tell their daughters to finish High School, College, get a good job, and then marry and start your family. Why wouldn’t we tell our daughters to finish High School, College, and get a good job, but instead of getting married travel, become successful in their career, and just live life, then get married?
By telling them to get married after college may be the reason you have so many women that are unhappily married. You have married women that are jealous of single women, their own daughters, cheating on their husband, and envy other single women. You have women that try and live their life through their daughter, in marriage counseling, and marriages ending in divorce. Keep in mind your husband is happy and loves you because he is doing what God has called him to be, the head of the house. So your unhappiness is very confusing to him, because he is playing his role, and you are unhappy playing your role.
I think this is the reason you see married women that are so judgmental, gossipers, envy, known to spread rumors, and just downright mean. Because they are seeing other women living their life, making their dreams come true, and moving freely without accountability to anyone but God and themselves, all because they got married too soon.
You see women are called to be a help mate, and to submit to their husbands Your husband has the final say on how you spend your money, in what order your children should be raised, and the order in which your home will be run.
As Christians are you sitting our daughters up to be unhappy later in their life by tell them to get married so early in life? Have you ever notice you never know how smart some women are until they are divorced? You never see how strong they are until they are divorced?
To all young women of all races that are Christians, you can get a man now, or you can wait until you figure out who you are, and what you want to do in this world.

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Looks can be deceiving

belinda

I remember in the last days of my Daddy’s life, a nurse came up to me and said that my Daddy was the best looking dying man she ever saw. Within 3 days of her comment he died.

Now you could hear the sadness in his voice, and also see it in his eyes if you really looked and listen hard enough. But within those three days it started to show, he had many stokes which caused him to lose his speech, and movement.

I remember a lady in my home town that would walk around with her head down all the time. She was mean, and never had anything good to say about anybody. She was married, and had children but it was like she had disconnected with them. I asked my Aunt Lena, “What’s wrong with her?” She said, “She died a long time ago, because of the words of the people and family in this town killed her.” I laughed and said, “She is not dead, she is walking around!” My Aunt Lena said, “You don’t have to close your eyes to be dead.”

How many times have we seen people that looked good, go to work everyday, and raise their families, but inside they are dying or already dead? They are dying because of bitterness, un-forgiveness, selfishness, fear, and other sins that kill us on the inside, but only show later in life on the outside.

For years they will seem like everybody else, but the closer they get to actually dying you will hear it in their voice, and see it in their eyes. When you speak of others being successful they will always speak negatively about that person. You will notice how they look at someone they are envy of when they walk into a room. Within days, or months they finally die, and they begin to walk around with their head down, become bitter, un-forgiveness will sit in, and they become very selfish, and controlling. They can become very moody, and usually drink a lot, or some other self medications.

Looks can be deceiving when you only look from the outside. Some of you are in relationships with people like this, but you are not paying attention to the signs. Unlike my Daddy they can come back to life, because they are broken but not beyond repair.

Man is not what he thinks he is, he is what he hides.”
André Malraux

What a difference a decision can make.

belinda

Have you ever seen people over a period of time start to look 10 years younger? In some cases you may not even recognize them. I have seen people that look like their complexion has gotten lighter, and not like they used some type of bleaching agent, but just like lighter, and brighter. There was a time when they would walk in a room, and nobody even noticed them, but now when they walk into a room everybody’s head turns.

In most cases they made a decision to let something go in their life. The demons some people carry around is down right deadly to their health and appearance. People, jobs, relationships, friends, and in some cases even family members can be the most unhealthy thing you have ever got involved with.

It will change your appearance and even cause you to age. How many times have you seen someone after a divorce and they looked totally different and younger? Or, that person that changed careers, broke off that relationship, friendship, or cut off that family member, and all of a sudden the light has come back in their face?

We need to realize that some people and some things have their own demons, and since God didn’t create you to deal with something like this it can destroy you. This is the reason some women and men age in a dysfunctional relationship. Men and women that are in position of management where they have to make hard decisions that goes against their personal beliefs will age, and wear depression like last fall’s fashions. If a man is married to a woman that has a drinking problem, and never dealt with anything like this in their life, they will start to look like they have the same problem, and never drink alcohol. A woman that is married to a man that has depression issues will start to take on the similar traits.

Some of you have noticed a change in yourself; you look in the mirror and don’t even recognize yourself. No amount of skin treatment, money, or designer clothes will make you look like yourself again. But that one decision to walk away from that situation that’s aging you, and causing depression, will make all the difference in the world.

Humans are like mirrors they will reflect what ever situation they are dealing with.
– Belinda Kendall