Why He Broke Your Heart! His Was Broken First!

th (1)

100929-0423by Jewel Tyler

God created man, then he took mans rib and created woman. Ribs encase a mans heart. Which means a woman is the closest thing to a man’s heart. I hear so many stories from men how tender their heart is when it comes to a woman they truly love and adore. He may have a tough exterior and demeanor; he is supposed to he is man who was created to cover a woman’s head and protect her and love her!

So many women MEN bash, but take a deeper look at that man who is now careless with his love and even body. Every man I know, met, talked too. A woman cracked his ribs and destroyed his heart, you are a repercussion of someone else’s mistakes and his heartache.

Ladies I am a mother of son’s, the eldest of six brothers and the best friend of many men. Recognize the POWER you have when it comes to a man. Love him tender, respect him, and most of all do not tear down his character, challenge his manhood. Step to him like you are a man, smack him in the face etc. and run for cover and help if he decides to smack you back. I do not condone a man hitting a woman EVER. But there is only so much any person can take.

If you are into playing games, purchase an Xbox or a Playstation.

Your destruction of his character and his heart can result in what you call a Playa, a Dog. They are just protecting themselves from never letting a rib near their tender heart again.

When God has blessed you with a good man – LOVE HIM.  I don’t care how much a person states they love being single – God did not create man to be alone or woman.

Learn to love him or her from the inside out not the outside in.  From the outside in by the time you find out who they really are the damage is already done.

Something to meditate on Ladies & Gents.

Stop by to join our group – Wake Up Girlfriend – https://www.facebook.com/groups/wakeupgirlfriend/

Advertisements

Learn When To Let Go of Him or Her

IMGP1346_1_1

 

by Belinda Kendall

I just had lunch with a man I have known for many years and he agreed to allow me share his story.  He was telling me about how he couldn’t understand why the girl he once dated is doing so much better than when they were.   I told him about the story about Jonah and how we used to laugh at his story instead of looking at the lesson in his story.

Jonah was running from God and what he told him to do. Jonah knew the reason for his struggles. This is the reason that when he was on the boat and everything started happening he said, “Its me, throw me over board”.

This lady you dated had a call on her life and she was running from it because it was too big for her to even imagine in her current situation. So she became distracted with dating you when she knew full well God had called her to do other things. This is why your relationship was full of drama and confusion. So once she left you and fulfilled what God had called her to do, things changed for her.

There are people in other people’s lives via relationships or friendships, and nothing seems to happen for them. It’s like all doors have been shut. But it has more to do with you or them and the call they have on their life.

When there is a call on your life, you will not be able to have peace until you do what has God told you to do. Not until you throw yourself overboard will you find peace.

This sadden him because he really did like the girl. So I told him its not like I am saying that you will never get back together, but she had an appointment she had to keep. So don’t beat yourself up that it was something you did. It was more of something she had to do. You see this a lot in relationships.

Learn to throw some people overboard, and even yourself, so you can make your appointment and find peace.

Some people have been stuck for many years in the same place. You need to ask yourself who has been in your life the whole time and throw them overboard. You may be surprised at the changes that will take place.

Trying To Find Love In All The Wrong Places

looking

By Jewel Tyler

Once upon a time in the land of no internet, men and women connected totally different.  Meeting places were laundromats, grocery stores, at friends homes, churches, parties and even at work.  Times have changed so much that the only way people approach one another is via the internet mainly on dating sites.  Some of which I call “meat markets.”  People have forgotten what it means to walk up to an individual they may be interested in and start a conversation.  Even after meeting one another I have seen individuals out on a date amongst other individuals in a social gathering texting one another.

What happened to good ole conversation with one another.  Sometimes, I become so frustrated when individuals want to carry on an hour long conversation via texting.  I will stop texting after a few texts and just simply call the person and you know what they will not answer the phone but continue texting me.  That is when I put my phone down and go on with my day.

Ladies you might think it is cute or sexy but you are attracting the wrong type of man by posting butt pics on the internet and dating sites; or pics in your bathroom in your underwear or worst.  The twerking craze is out of hand.  What you are telling men is, this is all I have to offer, my butt or back side or the fact I can shake my behind.  Don’t get me wrong, yes men enjoy it, but what are they saying about it?  “Man look at this freak right here.”  Is that what you really want to be labeled as if you are looking into engaging into a serious relationship?

I took several surveys on Tagged.com with a wide variety of men from all walks of life and age groups.  One of the questions I asked “Why are you REALLY on Tagged?”  The vast majority of their responses was ”To find me a freak  someone I can get with and keep it moving on to the next freak.”  I was like WOW really?  Women for the picking, and the sad thing is a lot of the women on these sites are there because they know when they are out and about socializing it is rare for a man to approach them.  Therefore, they go with the flow and try to connect on social networking sites.

What does it really say about a man that does not have enough self confidence to know they can connect with a woman without approaching them on a site.  I know this is the times that we live in.  However, the men I have connected with for mere investigative purposes for a book I am working on;  had numerous issues. Hence, the reason they were on the sites in the first place.  They live with someone they are not happy with and are looking for a way to cheat.  Or, they have so many problems themselves, unemployed, drugs, I could go on and on.  The sad thing is they could be telling you anything and women today are so desperate they fall for the okie doke.

If a man cannot walk up to me to approach me and have a decent conversation with me so I can look them in their eyes and read their body language to see if they are a liar, player or whatever, I am not interested.  I still have my Tagged account, but it is now there to push my books. That is the honest truth I used to log in on a normal basis because I could do my surveys.  But once they took away the ability to ask the questions I wanted for survey purposes I don’t have a need to sign in.  I am not interested in meeting you, giving you my number or any of that, I have heard too many tragic stories of women meeting men on line.

How can one truly separate the wheat from the tares online?  The internet to me now has become a place of exploitation.  Girls are getting their behind beat by their parents for inappropriate behavior.  It has also become dangerous for teenagers and young girls.  I have a friend that has a daughter that is 12 years old and she was online entertaining a 19 year old.  She lied about her age and was carrying on conversations with this older guy online.  Just dangerous sorry to digress.

Everyone just seems to be to be looking and seeking a companion and love but in all of the wrong places.  Where is the right place these days to meet someone that you could spend the rest of your life with?  I do welcome your comments and suggestions that I would like to share with our readers.

But this I do know, posting provocative pictures ladies and gents on every web site that you can sign up with is not going to land an individual you can spend the rest of your life with and really trust.  Because every time you catch that person on Tagged or Match or whatever site you are going to be wondering if they are flirting or chatting with a new prospect because that is where you met them.  If you met someone on line and you do in fact enter into a relationship with them.  The only way I can see it being successful is that you both delete your dating accounts online.  Because then and only then are you saying you know that I have found Mr. or Mrs. Right. I am off the market.

Adam & Eve Theory – Mr. or Mrs. Right

Image

by Jewel Tyler

Whether you are a Christian or not I would like you to consider my Adam and Eve theory.  First, as the story goes, God made Adam and found it was not good for Adam to be alone; he placed a deep sleep upon him, took from him a single rib and created Eve.  It also states in the Bible God says he knew us from the womb.  Take a closer look at this philosophy, and see if it can make common sense to you.

If God knew you from the womb, he already predestined your future.  For every Eve (woman), which is created there is the perfect Adam (man), created for her or vice versa.  The perfect fit, same ambitions, interests and dislikes total compatibility on one accord spiritually.  Someone you can converse with on any subject matter, someone who can satisfy your every need even sexually.  If you would like to have children, someone who can be a perfect father for your children you bear.  (Alternatively, children you already have given birth too!)  CLOSE YOUR MOUTH!  Yes, I truly believe this theory.

If God knew you from the womb, when he created you, he already had in mind who would be your perfect mate.  However, as life goes, when you reach the age to date; some women have a tendency to go after the FINE guys, or the someone which has something materialistically. Especially today younger women and even older want a “THUG”; guys that will call them out of their name and even smack them around. There are groups of women who go after males they actually have nothing in common with; but really believe if they can hang in the relationship things will get better.  If, they just give it a little more time and effort, he will change or they feel they have the ability to change him themselves.

Girlfriend! You cannot play the role of God; there is no human being on earth who can make, shape, form, let alone fashion or change another human being.  If, that were the case we could create, shape and mold the perfect child or situation for our life.  Only the grace of God has that power.  Give up on this theory. The whole idea of “I will give this a little more time, because I know I can change him.” or “I know I can make him stop using profanity, I know I can stop him from drinking, or using drugs, or playing video games all day or going to the strip club every weekend.”  “I can stop him from seeing other women, or hanging with his buddies more than he does me and the kids.”  Or, on the other hand, “It’s just me, I don’t know what to say out of my mouth.” “That is why he keeps busting me upside my head, he loves me, but he has problems and I’m not helping.” This is the classic one to me “If I call enough of the OTHER WOMEN and let them know I am his woman, they as well as he will get the picture and he will be with only me.”  If you have to call another woman to state who you are, and what role you play in the relationship, HE IS NOT YOUR MAN!

No woman should have to compromise, nor subject herself to calling numbers found in a man’s cell phone; after you know he was not with you the night before.  If he were very satisfied with you in the first place, he would not have the numbers in his phone or the lipstick on his collar, let alone come home with some sort of venereal disease.

You find you cannot communicate with him, he disrespects you, and he may even be the type who will have another relationship in a heartbeat; as well as maintaining his relationship with you.  Is that what you are really looking for in a relationship?

You may find in the beginning he was a hard worker, had practically all of the qualifications you thought you were looking for, and BAMN you find out there are missing links or components you desire of him.  You may even find yourself interested in finding another man to date.  On the other hand, you go so far as to becoming involved with another individual while you are maintaining your relationship with this person.  Then you begin to do a comparative analysis.  Well guy number one has at least five of the qualities I am looking for in a man, and guy number two has the other five qualities I require.  Then you become discouraged, even feeling guilty, because in actuality you really want to just simply find Mr. Right!  A person who has all 10 qualities or at least 9, which is a lot more workable than the five you have been dealing with for the past three years, etc.

WAKE UP GIRLFRIEND!  I know the saying goes opposites attract, but does it have to be so?  Do you really have to subject yourself to all the BS?  No, I do not think so; all it takes is some faith and a little more patience.  Then again, Mr. Right might be sitting right under your nose. . . .   A male best friend you have had for years which may have been secretly in love with you all along.  Someone you always run to and cry on his shoulder about all of your problems about the males you have been dating.  Oh, by the way have you noticed I used the word MALE and not MAN, we will discuss that later.

Now back to the Adam and Eve philosophy.  If we would have a little patience and faith and not subject ourselves to the first FINE male that comes along, he is the sex machine of the decade, or the guy who has the nice car, or job, he just simply seems to have it going on.  You might be open to receive who was originally made for you. I’m not saying he would not have all of these qualities.  There is a perfect partner awaiting you, but patience and perseverance is necessary in selecting or being selected by your perfect mate.  You have to ask yourself “are you ready if Mr. Right were to step in your life today?”

(to be continued)