by Jewel Tyler
Whether you are a Christian or not I would like you to consider my Adam and Eve theory. First, as the story goes, God made Adam and found it was not good for Adam to be alone; he placed a deep sleep upon him, took from him a single rib and created Eve. It also states in the Bible God says he knew us from the womb. Take a closer look at this philosophy, and see if it can make common sense to you.
If God knew you from the womb, he already predestined your future. For every Eve (woman), which is created there is the perfect Adam (man), created for her or vice versa. The perfect fit, same ambitions, interests and dislikes total compatibility on one accord spiritually. Someone you can converse with on any subject matter, someone who can satisfy your every need even sexually. If you would like to have children, someone who can be a perfect father for your children you bear. (Alternatively, children you already have given birth too!) CLOSE YOUR MOUTH! Yes, I truly believe this theory.
If God knew you from the womb, when he created you, he already had in mind who would be your perfect mate. However, as life goes, when you reach the age to date; some women have a tendency to go after the FINE guys, or the someone which has something materialistically. Especially today younger women and even older want a “THUG”; guys that will call them out of their name and even smack them around. There are groups of women who go after males they actually have nothing in common with; but really believe if they can hang in the relationship things will get better. If, they just give it a little more time and effort, he will change or they feel they have the ability to change him themselves.
Girlfriend! You cannot play the role of God; there is no human being on earth who can make, shape, form, let alone fashion or change another human being. If, that were the case we could create, shape and mold the perfect child or situation for our life. Only the grace of God has that power. Give up on this theory. The whole idea of “I will give this a little more time, because I know I can change him.” or “I know I can make him stop using profanity, I know I can stop him from drinking, or using drugs, or playing video games all day or going to the strip club every weekend.” “I can stop him from seeing other women, or hanging with his buddies more than he does me and the kids.” Or, on the other hand, “It’s just me, I don’t know what to say out of my mouth.” “That is why he keeps busting me upside my head, he loves me, but he has problems and I’m not helping.” This is the classic one to me “If I call enough of the OTHER WOMEN and let them know I am his woman, they as well as he will get the picture and he will be with only me.” If you have to call another woman to state who you are, and what role you play in the relationship, HE IS NOT YOUR MAN!
No woman should have to compromise, nor subject herself to calling numbers found in a man’s cell phone; after you know he was not with you the night before. If he were very satisfied with you in the first place, he would not have the numbers in his phone or the lipstick on his collar, let alone come home with some sort of venereal disease.
You find you cannot communicate with him, he disrespects you, and he may even be the type who will have another relationship in a heartbeat; as well as maintaining his relationship with you. Is that what you are really looking for in a relationship?
You may find in the beginning he was a hard worker, had practically all of the qualifications you thought you were looking for, and BAMN you find out there are missing links or components you desire of him. You may even find yourself interested in finding another man to date. On the other hand, you go so far as to becoming involved with another individual while you are maintaining your relationship with this person. Then you begin to do a comparative analysis. Well guy number one has at least five of the qualities I am looking for in a man, and guy number two has the other five qualities I require. Then you become discouraged, even feeling guilty, because in actuality you really want to just simply find Mr. Right! A person who has all 10 qualities or at least 9, which is a lot more workable than the five you have been dealing with for the past three years, etc.
WAKE UP GIRLFRIEND! I know the saying goes opposites attract, but does it have to be so? Do you really have to subject yourself to all the BS? No, I do not think so; all it takes is some faith and a little more patience. Then again, Mr. Right might be sitting right under your nose. . . . A male best friend you have had for years which may have been secretly in love with you all along. Someone you always run to and cry on his shoulder about all of your problems about the males you have been dating. Oh, by the way have you noticed I used the word MALE and not MAN, we will discuss that later.
Now back to the Adam and Eve philosophy. If we would have a little patience and faith and not subject ourselves to the first FINE male that comes along, he is the sex machine of the decade, or the guy who has the nice car, or job, he just simply seems to have it going on. You might be open to receive who was originally made for you. I’m not saying he would not have all of these qualities. There is a perfect partner awaiting you, but patience and perseverance is necessary in selecting or being selected by your perfect mate. You have to ask yourself “are you ready if Mr. Right were to step in your life today?”
(to be continued)